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HomeRefiner's Journal › The List and the Willing Heart
Teaching · Step 8

The List and the Willing Heart

Refined Recovery Network · All Scripture KJV · Port Allen, Louisiana
“If thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.”— Matthew 5:23-24 KJV

Step 8 is not looking backward at what was done wrong — that was Step 4. Step 8 is looking forward at who has something against you, and becoming willing to go. The list is forward-moving preparation, not backward-looking condemnation.

The Willing Heart Is the Work of Step 8

The amends themselves are Step 9. Step 8 is the willingness — becoming ready to make amends to every person on the list. That willingness does not always come naturally. For some names on the list, it must be asked for.

Matthew 5:23-24 shows the priority: before you bring your gift to God, go be reconciled to your brother. The reconciliation is not optional, and it comes before the offering. Step 8 is becoming willing to make that movement, even toward the names that produce resistance.

When They Also Harmed You

Some names on the list belong to people who also appear in your resentments. Both things can be true. They may have harmed you, and you may have harmed them. Step 8 addresses your column. Their accounting is between them and God.

This is not fair in the way the flesh defines fair. It is complete in the way God defines complete — because it removes your side of the equation from the wreckage, regardless of what they do with theirs.

Three Categories of Willingness

Look at each name with one of three designations: willing, conditionally willing, not yet willing. The conditional and not-yet entries are the Step 8 work. Bring them to God honestly. Ask for the willingness you do not have. He will provide it — but you must ask, and you must bring every name to that prayer, not just the easy ones.

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